message from within

i was feeling depressed past these few days…..well, due to some family issues that happened to be quite annoying…….they all affected me indirectly…and also directly.…i wanted to “write” blogs last sunday but i could not even move my fingers on the keyboard…….but something quite unusual happened today which changed my outlook…….

Woke up in the morning, about 10a.m. (yes, i like to toss around in my comfortable bed first before get my butt up)……..the golden sun ray shone through the window and it felt warm……i took a deep breath…..just try to forget all those nuisance….and suddenly a thought flashed through my mind…..”hey, lynette, it will gonna be okay, trust me, it will…”….huh?? like there was a voice told me this, it sounded assured, but i’m not that convinced by such simple statement there…..”you don’t even know what i’m facing now, who will ever understand???? Who??? i don’t have anyone to confide now”….(what i mean here is that i don’t wanna trouble anyone as they all busy studying in colleges, working, or maybe doing something that they really enjoy, who am i to ruin everything??? Besides, i don’t want everyone to think that i’m psychotic…you want me to ring them and say: oh, I got two relatives who’s going to *** soon…can you say something to make me feel better….uhh….gee….)

“yes, i may not know the real you, but i know you can go through these harsh times…..”

Frowning………

My goodness…that was the weirdest feeling I ever have in my life…i hope i’m not crazy, or having schizophrenia, or personality disorders…..

And later that afternoon, my mom came home with a name card in her hand, trembling with excitement……rarely see her that way….

“mommy, what are you up to??” “why don’t you take a look at this…..i can see some silver linings now…” replied me, passing that card over to me…..

The card written: mr. woo, specialized in treating cancer, body itch and diabetes, using traditional Chinese method…..

Mom said one of my distant relatives got recovery from uterus cancer a long long time ago after several visits to this 60-year old healer, it will truly work for my aunt…..what can I say more, woa…..haha….chemotherapy for my aunt would be suffering…..and consider the cost of this treatment…..and now, without any side effects, she can have a chance to become her well being again…..healthy…..

Thank god!!!!!!

That voice…..which came out of nowhere……hey, where are you??

Is that true?? When almost all our hopes are gone, when we are desperate, there comes a miracle….haha…i’m not exaggerated here, to me, it’s like a miracle, which happens once in a while….well, which I thought only in movies…..maybe it’s time for me to believe in such “absurd” thing now….

Hello, where are you…hey, come out, i wouldn’t scold you like I did last time…..oohhh….never mind, i’m gonna leave you a message, thanks for being my guidance, i know you just want me to be optimistic in my life, not to worry so much….but you can’t change me in just a day time, but i’ll try my best to do so…..

p.s. I’m perfectly sane….i’ve passed the Rorschach test with excellence….hehe…